I blinked. It seems like just yesterday our girls were in kindergarten and the first grade. My husband Michael and I would walk them to school with their trusty Max carrying their bookbags and lunch boxes in his doggy backpack.
Now, they are back on The Hill in Ohio, beginning their senior year of college.
As parents one thing that we never asked them was “What do you want to be when you grow up?” When I was a kid, I hated that question because I didn’t want to be just one thing. Instead, we have always told the girls that what is most important in life is that they find a vocation that is meaningful to them, doesn’t hurt others, and that they lead their lives with dignity and kindness.
I think it is unfair to ask young humans “what they want to be” because it forces them to define themselves in terms of work in the market economy.
Instead of asking “what they want to be”, I ask freshmen in my Introduction to Cultural Anthropology course three questions:
(1) What kind of life do you want to lead?
(2) How do careers and professions fit into that kind of life?
(3) How do I use my time in college to develop the skills, values, habits, experiences, and networks to get started?
They complete the assignment and I collect it, so that we can revisit their answers at the end of the semester.
In the first couple of weeks, we talk about the higher education system in the United States and compare it to other countries around the world. Students are almost always surprised to find out that in many countries in Europe higher education is paid for by taxpayers rather than by students and their families. We talk about the fact that they and their families have decided to invest a significant amount of time and money in the pursuit of higher education.
I ask them what they think the purpose of higher education is. Inevitably, I get a “to get a good job” response. To which I reply, that is only part of it. Another important goal of a college education is to grow both intellectually and personally. This growth will prepare them to be successful in both their lives and careers.
Many students at WIU are first generation college students and they are stepping into an entirely new culture, which can be both exciting and overwhelming. As someone who obviously likes school and has been at it for a long time, I give them some pointers on how to succeed.
(1) Go to class and be both mentally and physically present. In other words, stay off your phone or laptop unless asked to use it in class.
(2) Be curious about everything. Take classes that you know nothing about. Join a club that sounds interesting. Get to know people who look different than you do and maybe speak a different language as well.
(3) Get to know your professors. Look for those who can help guide you through your time here and mentor you along the way.
(4) Ask for help early and often. Things won’t always go the way you want. You may fail a test or get homesick, so do what Mr. Rogers said, "Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”
(5) Practice one of the cornerstones of anthropology, by not being ethnocentric. Don’t judge others because their way of doing things is different than what you are used to. You don’t have to like it but try and understand why people do what they do.
College can be a transformational experience if you embrace it – even the uncomfortable moments. As Thoreau said, “Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you’ve imagined.”
Best wishes to all the new college students out there. Have a great year!
Heather McIlvaine-Newsad is a professor of Anthropology at Western Illinois University.
The opinions expressed are not necessarily those of the university or Tri States Public Radio.
Diverse viewpoints are welcomed and encouraged.